Sketchbook Update

I am done.

I need to mail this out asap.

But I am going to charge my camera and take a few photos first.

I promise.

Sketchbook Update(ish) #2

Oh, how I am the silly little monkey.

This is why I took on this sketchbook project - to follow through on something.  To FINISH something.  I have worked on it, I swear.  Just not that much...

But I'd like to say that I have been working on art projects.  I just can't say too much about them, because they are meant to be gifts for Christmas.  That's positive.

It's always little lazy excuses for not updating you on my sketchbook project.  The sheepish excuse I'm using right now:  "I need to use my real camera instead of the camera on my phone to take a picture of the book, and that means I have to find my usb cord, upload the photos onto my computer, sift through the photos that are already on there (which means I'm going to get distracted) and then I can post a photo onto my blog...but it's already dark, and I'm not going to get a good shot with this lighting."

Is this normal???

Do other people make these lame excuses to not do SIMPLE tasks?

It's like a Lego has been placed in front of me, and I think, "Holy crap look at that wall!  I'm never going to be able to climb over that!  I may as well sit down and have some tea."  And I do.  Sit.  But without the tea, because that's all the way in the kitchen, and I have to heat up the water...

What is wrong with me?

There are so many days that I just sit and stop.  Stop working, stop moving, everything...stops.  Except for my mind.  And my self criticism. 

Maybe I should see a shrink...

Sketchbook Update #1

Howdy,

As promised, an update on my Sketchbook Project.

Remember, the theme I was given was monochromatic.  So, using a gauche wash (ha, that's pronounced "gwash wash") I painted each page a different color.  I decided to keep it light and a little uneven, giving it a slight watercolor effect.  And....

that's all I've done.

That's alright, though.  This was the most tedious part of the project, lots of painting and waiting, with some hair dryer action during my impatient periods.  But it's all done now, and I'm really happy that this part is finished.  I haven't taken any photos yet, but I will. 

The next step is going to be fun:  doodling!  I'm going to let my imagination run wild with this part, so stay tuned...

Hey! I Have a Reason to Update!

Look at that title! I'm actually doing something interesting enough to me that's worthy of blogging! How about that?

This is what it is...

http://www.arthousecoop.com/projects/sketchbookproject

Did you click on it? Not yet? Okay. I'll tell you about it. It's called The Sketchbook Project. I will be one of thousands participating in filling up a sketchbook for the Brooklyn Art Library. We can do whatever we want. It's all about showcasing our process as an artist - how we form ideas, what flows from our brains, and just an expression of ourselves. When we're done, we mail our sketchbook to the Brooklyn Art Library. Then the books will tour the country, and maybe even other parts of the world. Pretty cool, huh?

Now for the nail-biting stuff (at least to me). Each sketchbook has a sticker on the back cover containing the owner's name and a bar code. During the tour, the books will be scanned, keeping track of each and every time your sketchbook is looked at. I'll get an email whenever anyone looks at my book...

what if I don't get any emails? Ick. I'm not sure I like this tracking process. Can't I just fill up my book, send it back, and know I have something somewhere? I'll be satisfied with that.

When all is said and done, the sketchbooks will go back to the Brooklyn Art Library, where they will be archived and stay there (in low echoing voice) FOREVER.

I'm really excited about this project. Oh! I forgot to mention that we got themes to help us find a direction to go with our sketchbook. We were able to pick from a list of themes, or let the computer randomly decide for us. Since I am the most indecisive person I know, I let the computer choose my fate, and it selected "monochromatic". I'm actually happy with that. I already have a few ideas. I really need to stop thinking of ideas because, as I said before, I am indecisive.

Okay, brain...pick an idea...aaaaaaand...done. Idea settled on. Not changing. Nope. It's set.

But I'm not telling you what it is. Not just yet.

So, for my next several blog posts (yes, I will update!) I think I will let you know about my progress, and offer up little sneak peaks. Since I won't be getting my sketchbook back when I'm done, I figure it'll be a good idea to document it all and maybe photograph the finished product.

Woohoo! I'm doing something! Something exciting! Something creative! Something for me!

I Like Quotation Marks

Trying to find my way.

There is so much in me that wants to write. But I don't take these desires seriously. I say to myself, "You're creative, just write. You don't need to make notes, do drafts or outlines. Just write."

But it doesn't work that way. I am not an incredible writer. I can be. But I need to take it more seriously. I need to practice. I need to put actual effort and thought into the process, rather than just "let my feelings flow and allow my fingers to do the talking..."

...blah, blah, blah. That is just a bunch of malarkey.

I can do this. I can become a better writer. I can become a better anything if I actually practice and work at the desired skill.

I'm not there. I am far from there, and I don't think I will ever truly reach "there". There is no end to improvement. There is an end, however, when you quit. And that's not what I want to do.

It's been a long time, I know.

But I don't feel like writing.

So much is going on, but what's plaguing my mind right now are not my stories to tell.

I'll get back to this, in time.

I Like Me, but I Like You More

Trying new things scares me. I try to convince myself that staying in a state of comfort and contentment is a good thing. But I know this is not true. I get scared to dive (or even tip-toe) into new endeavors, so I don't try.

No es bueno.

In my attempts to get out of my comfort zone, I have agreed to help a dear friend with a school project. She is taking a children's literature class, and for her final, she needs to create a children's book. My part in this project is to illustrate it.

Yikes.

The past six years of having the title of ARTIST for my occupation would make you think that I'm absolutely bonkers for feeling nervous about illustrating a children's book. But I can't help it, these types of things freak me out. It's one thing to draw endless amounts of food and silly grocery-related images that, for me, hold no emotional attachment. It's become almost an assembly line of sorts, one sign after another, after another, after another - albeit, a fun assembly line. But I don't create these signs for me, nor do I make them for friends and loved ones. I do it for "the man", how he wants it, and I say "ok". That's alright - it's not going in my house.

To take on a project that matters to someone important to me...that's another story, and I don't want to let them down.

But that's why I'm doing it. It forces me to really take pride in the project, to focus, and to use my own imagination. Nothing motivates me more than making sure I'm not letting someone else down.

One of these days, I will mean as much to me as the people I care about. I will care enough to not want to let myself down. One of these days I'll work on projects for myself, because they will help me grow and learn. It's not going to happen today, though. But to tackle this project is the first step to telling myself, "Hi there. I love you."